Unfulfilled Deathwish

Amidst the joy and the glee
and when the lights rise in the night and flicker.
I see darkness drilling into me deeper. 
Hollowness seeps painfully
right into my soul.

Chills of morning they hit me, they repel.
Sensing something colder that rests within me.
I guess some good memories have now
turned back to hurt me, oh, the irony!

Love was. The ultimate folly
has infested my soul with melancholy.
I'm not fine, once again i have lied.
All the pain under a smile, discreetly disguised.

I don't remember the face, I remember the feeling
Just enough, for the killing
My emotions are stabbing me, Why can't i die?
All the tears frozen, in the corner of my eye.

I  can't feel my heartbeat but there is no flat line.
My breathing is gone but the respiration is fine.
An Unfulfilled deathwish of
someone is dead.
Someone is alive